Fill your classroom with contagious little giggles with these hilarious jokes for your first graders! Jokes can relieve stress, and break down nerves and anxieties in your classroom – and a well-timed joke can make lessons enjoyable for students and teachers. So why not treat your kids to some morning entertainment or lunchtime laughter?
Here are 72 of our best side-splitting quips to liven up your kiddos’ day!
1. Why is 1+1=3 like your left foot?
It’s not right.
2. Teacher: Can anyone tell me how many seconds there are in a year?
Student: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd…
3. Why was the music teacher not able to open his classroom?
Because his keys were on the piano.
4. Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honeycombs!
5. What do you call a fly without wings?
A walk.
6. Why didn’t the orange cross the street?
Because it ran out of juice.
7. Why did the Skittle go to school?
He really wanted to be a Smartie.
8. What do you call a cow lying in the dirt?
Ground beef
9. How do mountains stay warm in the winter time?
Snowcaps
10. What has many ears but can’t hear anything?
A cornfield
11. What shoes do spies wear?
Sneakers!
12. Why doesn’t the sun go to college?
Because it already has a million degrees!
13. What did the science book say to the math book?
“Wow, you’ve got problems.”
14. Where did the pencil go for vacation?
To Pennsylvania.
15. What kind of bees read the dictionary?
A spelling bee
16. How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it!
17. What is money called in outer space?
Starbucks
18. What did the student say to the geography teacher?
“The world is a cat playing with Australia”
19. Why can’t the pony sing?
Because she is a little horse.
20. “Knock knock” “Who’s there?” “Wooden shoe” “Wooden shoe who?”
“Wooden shoe like to know!”
21. Who is king of the school supplies?
The ruler
22. What’s the difference between elephants and a piece of paper?
You can’t make a paper plane out of an elephant.
23. My kid’s shoelaces got into a fight. Who won?
It was a tie.
24. What did the ghost teacher say to the class?
“Keep your eyes on the board while I go through it again.”
25. Why was the choir teacher so good at baseball?
Because she had perfect pitch.
26. What do you call two banana peels together?
A pair of slippers!
27. What is a computer program’s favorite snack?
Computer chips
28. Why couldn’t the egg say the punchline to his joke?
Because he would crack-up!
29. What do you call a sad raspberry?
A blueberry
30. Why didn’t the sun go to school?
Because it was too bright!
31. What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalapeño face!
32. Why did the bicycle stand on its own?
It’s too tired.
33. Why did the jelly roll?
It saw the apple turnover!
34. What do you call a book that’s about the brain?
A mind reader!
35. Why don’t some animals play cards?
Because they are afraid of cheetahs!
36. What do you call a dog that tells time?
A watch dog!
37. What did one hat say to the other?
You stay here, I’ll go on ahead.
38. What’s a cat’s favorite color?
Purr-ple!
39. Why did the student bring scissors to school?
Because he wanted to cut class!
40. Why did the kid study in the airplane?
Because he wanted higher grades.
41. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?
Because he was always spotted.
42. What did one wall say to the other?
Meet you at the corner!
43. Why did the banana go to the hospital?
Because it wasn’t peeling well!
44. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite!
45. Why was the belt arrested?
Because it was holding up a pair of pants!
46. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she will let it go!
47. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back?
A stick.
48. How does a train eat?
It goes chew chew!
49. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
50. Why did the student eat his homework?
Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake!
51. How do you organize a space party?
You planet!
52. What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
Arrr!
53. Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?
He wanted to go to high school!
54. What do you call a cat who can play guitar?
A mewsician!
55. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
56. What did the big flower say to the little flower?
Hi, bud!
57. Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open.
58. What did the traffic light say to the car?
Don’t look, I’m changing!
59. How do you make an octopus laugh?
With ten-tickles!
60. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
61. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because he was already stuffed!
62. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
63. What does a cloud wear under his raincoat?
Thunderwear!
64. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman.
65. Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
66. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
67. Why did the math book look sad?
Because it had too many problems.
68. How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a nut!
69. Why are ghosts bad at lying?
Because you can see right through them.
70. What kind of key can’t open a lock?
A donkey.
71. Why was the math test unhappy?
It felt very testy.
72. What’s a tree’s favorite drink?
Root beer!
Grandparents Day Activities For Preschoolers: Worksheets, Pretend Play, And More