With all energy focused on learning and worrying about social status, we know how drab a teenage classroom can be at times! Laughter has been proven to release happy hormones which can help your teens lighten up and take the edge off after a stressful day. We invite you to reduce classroom anxiety and enhance the overall positive atmosphere with our collection of 70 humorous jokes.
1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
Because it was two-tired!
2. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus!
3. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole-in-one!
4. Why did the picture go to jail?
Because it was framed!
5. What do you call a group of musical whales?
An orca-stra!
6. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
7. Why did the math book look sad?
Because it had too many problems!
8. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
A can’t opener!
9. How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a nut!
10. What is the skeleton’s favorite musical instrument?
A trombone!
11. Why couldn’t the pony sing a lullaby?
She was a little horse!
12. Why was the belt arrested?
For holding up a pair of pants!
13. How do you organize a space party?
You planet!
14. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
15. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back?
A stick!
16. What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
Bison!
17. Why did the chicken go to the seance?
To get to the other side!
18. What do you call a snobbish criminal going downstairs?
A condescending con descending!
19. How does a train eat?
It goes chew-chew!
20. Why don’t oysters donate to charity?
Because they’re shellfish!
21. What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
22. What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt!
23. Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker?
Because he always found a way to lift people’s crops!
24. What do you call a nosy pepper?
Jalapeño business!
25. How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it!
26. Why did the crab never share?
Because he was shellfish!
27. What do you get when you cross a computer and a lifeguard?
A screensaver!
28. Why did the banana go to the doctor?
It wasn’t peeling well!
29. What do you call a cow that can play an instrument?
A moosician!
30. What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
Arrrrrrrr!
31. Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
32. What do you call a dog that can do magic?
A Labracadabrador!
33. What did the big flower say to the little flower?
Hi, bud!
34. What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A roamin’ Catholic!
35. What did the traffic light say to the car?
Don’t look, I’m changing!
36. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese.
37. Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
38. What do you call a fake noodle?
An Impasta.
39. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was already stuffed.
40. What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?
Boo-berry pie!
41. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?
Because he was always spotted.
42. How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together.
43. What’s a snake’s favorite subject?
Hiss-tory.
44. What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?
Kitty Perry.
45. Why did the scarecrow become a successful politician?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
46. Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.
47. Why was the math book unhappy?
It had too many problems.
48. What do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite.
49. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
50. Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?
Because he wanted to go to high school.
51. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
52. What did one wall say to the other?
I’ll meet you at the corner.
53. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she will let it go.
54. What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
55. How do oceans say hello?
They wave.
56. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything.
57. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman.
58. Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
They could crack up.
59. How do you throw a space party?
You planet.
60. What does a cloud wear under his raincoat?
Thunderwear!
61. Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honeycombs!
62. Why did the man put his money in the blender?
He wanted to make some liquid assets.
63. What does one wall say to the other wall?
I’ll meet you at the corner.
64. Why don’t we ever tell secrets on a farm?
Because the potatoes have eyes, the corn has ears, and the beans stalk.
65. Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired.
66. What did one plate say to the other?
Dinner is on me!
67. Why did the student eat his homework?
Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
68. Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks.
69. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
70. Why don’t some fish play piano?
They’re afraid of the keys.
Helping You Crack The Code & Understand 69 Contemporary Teen Slang Words